Session 6

This session we started with a discussion about the grandparent letters. I was very pleased to see that most of the group completed the assignment and wanted to share. S1 shared that as she wrote her letter she found more she liked about the person and included that in her letter. L1 wrote to a former teacher and asked if I could help her deliver it. H3. is going to mail his letter, and so are L1, S1, and T.

During this week’s session we continued on to read chapter 7. L1 had asked if she could read it to us and complete the workbook chapter about beauty. The group agreed that they felt Loki Bella was beautiful and recognized beauty as more than someone’s appearance. S1 raised her hand just to ask if they would get to share and talk about the questions. The answer was of course yes, but I appreciate that she is becoming more confident and excited about sharing. She smiles more now during Manadoob and her higher self esteem shows in her interactions with peers in other Club programs. L1 shared a story about a friend who got teased once, and she now feels bad that she didn’t do more. She said that she wished she could go back and do something about it. H2 said that when she gets teased she doesn’t really get bothered because of how her mom has explained it to her. She shared that she tries to understand what the other person may be feeling or “what’s wrong with them.” L2 shared toward the end of the discussion that he had been called weird before and I replied by saying that I think he has a very outgoing personality and is funny. I asked him if he felt what I said was true and described him well and he agreed. We talked about the possibility that maybe the person calling him weird just thought he was funny but maybe chose a word that L2 didn’t really like. The group encouraged L2 to ask next time someone calls him a word like weird for them to clarify what they mean.

As we continued on to chapter 8 everyone in group volunteered to read. We started our discussion about the word “obsessed” and it’s meaning, but unfortunately ran short on time. H3 spoke of his obsession with Pokémon cards and immediately L2 responded that he feels the same and “just can’t stop playing video games.” When H3 said “same here man,” in such a serious tone it was all I could do to keep from laughing. They are too funny sometimes, and although this is not where I had intended the discussion on obsessions to go, if this is how they can relate it works for me. We will need to finish up the workbook section of chapter 8 this next week and talk a little but more about this topic in the context of the book which I’m sure will go great. I know that they will be very excited to be able to start a project with their supplies as that has been the big question each week since we started! 

Session 5

Thursday in Manadoob we finished up the last of chapter 5 and continued on to chapter 6.  The take home option I had given them for writing a short story about a gift of kindness has been postponed until next week. (Some Club members had completed but forgotten it, and with the reminder others seemed interested.)  I also gave members the assignment of writing the letter to a grandparent or similar person in an effort to save time since we always seem to be lacking in that. We will be discussing both in our next session.

We started with a check in about the Think & Do of being kind and happy for an entire day. L1 thoughtfully shared that she had gone to volunteer at the Humane Society over the weekend and made a conscious effort to have a happy mood. She said that that’s how she would want someone to act if she were in a cage all day and also commented on her dog that is blind that she has taught 14 tricks. S1 talked of how she had cheered up a friend and realized that by doing that it made her feel happier too. H1 asked someone at school who looked sad to play with him.

After we read chapter six and I asked the group to get out their workbooks again I heard unanimous moans and groans which made me smile because this means they are hooked! We have reached that point in the program where they have become invested and interested and I am very excited about this. The discussion we had about chapter six was emotional and a little tough at times, but I am thoroughly impressed with how the group supported one another. I decided since our group is developing well to pull myself back a bit during the discussion. I let them know that I was there to listen and I wanted them to talk about the first questions in chapter six as a group (knowing now that most of the time they want to share about each thing). Right away L1 spoke up and asked who wanted to go first. Several group members spoke of a loss and openly talked about who or what and how they felt. Most of the group was very focused, however one group member, M, struggled a bit in a way I was not expecting. She withdrew and engaged a member sitting next to her in giggling and talking about unrelated topics. H2 is kind of like the group task monitor and quickly leaned over to me and was concerned about this, instead of correcting them myself I encouraged her to wait her turn and share her feelings. As our conversation continued L1 told us of the loss of her bunny who she says she felt was like a person to her. L2 shared how a friend moved away and it made him sad, H1 talked about his fish that died and told the group he felt like L1. L1 told the group that she feels like her bunny is with her not physically but metaphorically because her mom made her a bunny stuffed animal and it helps her feel better. L2 supported her by saying “I like that.”  Other group members talked of friends or loved ones, favorite things or simply passed if they didn’t feel like sharing.

Toward the end of our discussion we talked about the power we have to control our reactions and what we think about things. The group seemed to like the idea of being able to decide how they want to feel about something and the power this gives them. The energy seemed a bit low at the end of group so I told everyone they were required to take a moment to smile, even if it was fake, which had the outcome I had hoped for since all of us looked around and laughed.

One of the best moments happened after class when L1 approached me and thanked me for the opportunity to talk about these things and that she really appreciated it. I am really enjoying seeing her come out of her shell.

Session 3 - 4

We have had several members who were absent at the first 2 meetings attend the group and it seems fitting to provide an introduction for them as well.

H1 is typically very social and interested in talking and sharing.  However, I noticed in Manadoob he was considerably more reserved. I am hoping this may be due to it being his first session and getting used to the group. He and H3 are good friends and I’m sure will benefit from the support of having one another as part of the group.

L1 is an eleven year old girl who I would consider to be a quiet but influential leader of the group. She has a calm presence and respectfully engages other group members. She seems to be quite dedicated to the program already and interested during our meetings.

K  is an energetic young girl.  She is open to sharing at every opportunity and seems to be excited about the program. She is friends with H2 but seems to be comfortable on her own.

T is a very quiet and sweet girl. She is very close to her siblings and outside of Manadoob spends much of her time with her younger brother in a caretaking role. She has become more confident within the group quickly and holds several qualities that remind me of L1

S1 I asked to join the group because of her very obvious quiet and timid personality. She was new to the Club this year and keeps to herself during free time at the Club. I am hoping Manadoob will be a good place to start in welcoming her to play a more active role in our “Club family.”

As far as our Manadoob session, I think that it went well. After adding several people to the group we had eight in attendance for the past two weeks. Our group seems to be meshing well and generally happy with the time we spend together. The only complaint I have heard so far is that there isn’t enough time for Manadoob and it should be multiple times per week. I guess I wouldn’t really consider that a complaint but a testament to how much they enjoy it!

Although I had planned to be through chapter 7 by now we are still working through chapter 5. To my surprise, after each question if I offer the chance to share every member raises their hand.   Because of this, it has become a habit to review and simply go around the table for each person to either share or pass if they wish. Although I feel somewhat pressured for time to be able to cover the material in the amount of time we are able to dedicate to Manadoob, I feel that having meaningful discussion is far more beneficial to the kids. As a group we decided to spend extra time discussing what we are learning and made the story assignment in chapter five a take home option.

L1, T, L2, and S1, all offered to share what they felt it means to be shy. After each shared I pointed out the theme I had noticed - that each of them perfectly described characteristics of themselves, a perfect response to “what shy means to you.” We talked of the importance of understating how each person’s perception may be different but just as relevant and worthy of respect. I asked if each of them would consider themselves to be shy and with smiles they all said yes. I was proud of their willingness to share this, in a way challenging that shy characteristic they each saw in themselves. L1 shared how much effort she feels it takes for her to socialize and speak to others and many of the other members showed their agreement and support of her statement.

We discussed our group and how to keep it a safe space for sharing, that each of them feel a bit less shy in this space. During this discussion L1 also shared that she feels she relates to Wella in a very important way, the loss of a pet. I was touched that she would share something so personal after just two meetings with our group. I feel for L1’s loss and am impressed with her bravery to talk about the “tough stuff” and create that personal connection to the story.

Our group ended with each being asked to complete the Think and Do activity of spending a day happy and kind. I will be interested to see the results after our talk about shyness. Some seemed hesitant but luckily I will see them through the week and can give subtle reminders and encouragement.