Session 17 Patience

This week each of us shared our favorite Manadoob character to get started. I thought this might be a good way to prepare for our next session when we create our masks of a favorite character. I reminded our group that next week is our final meeting and heard from several that they weren’t happy about this. T and H3 like Griff Bob best because of his humor, K likes Uma Lily because she is part dolphin, and S1 agreed adding that she thinks Uma Lily is honest and wise like herself. Yama Cruz is L1’a favorite because of the patience he shows with Wella. H2’s favorite is Latona Maya because of her unique mix of a pig and a pony.

Last week we left off before doing chapter 26: Patience in the workbook, so we started there discussing the Nairi stone and its meaning. We each shared one thing to be patient about. For T and K they both feel they could be more patient about their birthdays. S1 wants to be more patient about earning money; H3 admitted he could be more patient about waiting for Thursdays. When I asked him why Thursdays, he replied that he looks forward to Manadoob! H2 wants to show more patience towards others, especially when they interrupt. L1 shared she is feeling impatient about an upcoming memorial on spring break for her bunny that passed away; each year her family gets together to hold a small remembrance of her bunny at this time. We agreed that keeping the Naira stone close may be helpful and after reading the moobiki hint L1 and S1 whispered to one another and smiled. When I looked toward them L1 smiled and asked why they only get one stone to share, that she needs several in her family. Everyone in group started laughing about this and agreed that at times multiple stones may be helpful in this area. I appreciate the relationship L1 and S1 are creating; they have been sitting next to one another and sometimes whisper amongst themselves during breaks in group. I hope to see this friendship continue to develop after Manadoob as well.

We read through chapter 27 together and watched the video Kids & Animals – A Healing Partnership. Next week will be a very busy session as well, and I hope to discuss the video and finish chapter 28. The last part of our session will be spent working on our masks and having some snacks to celebrate our group. J

Session 16

Today was Valentines Day and the kids seemed very aware of this fact so I chose to tie a bit of that into the lesson; we each shared one thing we LOVE about our lives to start off the day. S1 loves that she has a good mom and dad, T loves her family, H3 loves his awesome time in Manadoob, L2 still loves the courage he showed to express his feelings to dad, and M listed the Club, Manadoob, and her family. I shared my love for my job and K chose to forgo sharing at this time.

We worked through chapter 22: Thankfulness, which many of the group thought would be more appropriate at Thanksgiving. Interesting that so much of a person’s feelings and habits can be tied to a holiday or any specific day for that matter. So we broke this habit and on Valentines Day, instead of Thanksgiving, chose to share about what we are thankful for in our lives. Everyone was very excited to finish their windsocks by adding several statements about these things and be able to take them home. It didn’t really surprise me when several group members chose to wear them instead as hats. All that candy was setting in and the group was feeling silly! I look forward to asking next week what became of the windsocks/hats after group.

It seemed very fitting to move on to chapter 23: Humor after the windsocks became hats. We brought out the Moobia stone Rahwa and H3 instructed us to “let it flow.” We thought about things that make us laugh and cheer us up when we are feeling down. Some of our experiences included a friend singing a funny song, tickling, helping animals, jokes, and taking time alone. We took in the moobiki hint and moved on to talk about judgment. As we read through the chapter there were gasps and sounds of surprise when Ga-loom shared his fear of being alone rather than intent to be scary. I loved this moment, and as we finished reading the group seemed content with this realization. After doing some reflecting we were all able to think of a time when we were maybe too quick to judge someone or something else. However, we instead shared how we had felt in the past when we had been judged by others. In short, it doesn’t feel good; we don’t like it, and agreed to give people and animals more of a chance before creating opinions and judgments such as those created about lonely Ga-loom.

We did a quick time check and chose to use the reaming few minutes to continue on reading with the hope of finishing chapter 25: Confidence and reading through chapter 26: Patience. We created a list together of the things our group felt helped Wella become more confident. Our list consisted of things like helping Zack, learning to express her feelings in a healthy way, the Moobia stones, facing her fear of Ga-loom and in return getting better rest, that Zack was nice to Wella, and doing better in school. Next week it will be one to chapter 26 and then one last session afterwards.

The group really enjoyed being able to explore their Moobia stones and seemed excited to read through several chapters throughout the day. We were able to make some great progress and all of the credit goes to the hard work and focus of our group. I notice I no longer need to ask for volunteers to read because before I get a chance members are asking me if they can first. I see the change in our group each time we meet, they have taken ownership of this group and often when they raise their hands and I call on no one, someone will whisper a reminder, “This is our group we don’t have to do that.” I started this earlier on because I don’t want to be seen only as the adult in the room, I felt it would be more effective if I was also a learner, working alongside them. This is not to say that I don’t step in and help facilitate at times and share the plan for the day but this small group is a great opportunity for each member to practice respecting one another and to be self monitoring in their sharing. Another aspect of this that I find helpful is that they stay engaged in the conversation, they cannot just raise their hand and check out, to know when to share they must be listening.

Session 15 Courage

This week was very different from last week, our group had much more positive energy and I would say most definitely a case of the giggles. We did check in by picking a stone that represented our thoughts or feelings for that day. At the end of group we each shared one statement including the meaning of that stone to explain our choice.

We continued our discussion on forgiveness and what this means for each of us. A consensus was reached about whether or not we feel able to forgive someone who has lied and apologized for it.  We decided that people make mistakes and if they apologize sincerely they deserve a second chance, but that it  may be different if the behavior is a pattern. T brought up the example of the boy who cried wolf and shared the story with the group to illustrate this point.

On to chapter 21: Anger.  In this chapter we learned about the Amara stone of courage and talked about how we can act with courage in our lives.

S1 felt that she could try helping someone who looks down. This would be courageous for her because she feels shy.

K thought that she could stand up for herself more.

T wants to try more to meet new people.

L2 also wanted to stand up for himself.  He shared that he had stood up for himself recently and it made him feel happy and brave, but chose not to share the details in group.

M want to have courage when she gets older, and was worried about what it will be like.

As we continued to talk and bring in examples of how we had acted with courage in the past H2 struggled to share a memory of this. S1 asked if she could she could share something for H2 and told us she felt H2 has showed courage a few weeks back when she shared even though she was feeling worried. I pointed out to the group that in that moment S1 had just met her goal for showing courage and this realization resulted in a giant smile across S1’s face.

We wrote down three things that make us feel angry, stood up, and as a group yelled them as loud as we could. What a change from this group in just a couple of weeks. Everyone participated with courage in this activity!

We read chapter 22 in the book but ran out of time to start the workbook portion. Each of us shared our statement about the moobia stone we had picked. L2 shared about how he had picked Rahwa because he felt thankful for the chance to spend more time with his mom. He was able to stand up for himself and express to his parents who he wanted to stay with for awhile. L2 had initially not wanted to share this with the group and for whatever reason he chose to share anyway. All this courage talk must have paid off!

Session 14: Tuli

Today we started our session by taking a few deeps breaths, stretching, and taking a seat.  We had a discussion about the experience of putting our worries in a bag and keeping them somewhere safe while sleeping. Several group members felt there was no change, while for others there was a different feeling about it. M told the group how she when she had put her worries somewhere safe it was easier for her to forget about them. H3 was worried about not deliberately putting them somewhere safe because he had forgotten them in his mom’s car, but when he looked at them again later he did feel better.

After a few minutes of sharing I felt like the group was really struggling to stay engaged so we stood up and shook it all out. Most of our group was hesitant today to let loose and be silly and I asked them about this. I received feedback confirming from almost everyone that they were feeling like it had been an off day. Some were tired, feeling down, too much to do, etc. S1 shared a technique she uses when she is feeling this way, taking three very deep breaths and letting her hands rest in her lap. After a little bit of encouragement she led the group in this exercise and we created a plan for the rest of our meeting.

We then talked a little bit about the Tuli stone. H3 was able to recite the definition without even looking at his book, reminding us of the importance to trust and believe in ourselves. M seemed disappointed because she forgot to carry it with her so I asked that she try and think about a day it might have been helpful and what that would have been like. She shared a couple examples and that she wanted to work on remembering for next week. T took it skating with her one day and remembered continually checking to make sure she hadn’t lost it. She felt that having it with her helped her believe she could skate faster. S1 told us that she didn’t tell or show anyone her stone but kept it in her pocket for a day. She told us that it made her smile when she reached to see if it was there and felt like maybe it pushed her to try and be happier. H3 was very proud of his Tuli stone, sharing that he took it to the before school program he attends and presented it during share time. I love H3’s enthusiasm and openness to really dive in to Manadoob!

As I have mentioned in the past few posts the group is really into the story and always asking if we will be reading. We read chapter 20 and learned about how Zack found out he is adopted and all of the feelings that accompanied this discovery. Our group had much to say about this issue and varying opinions, which seemed to change as our discussion continued. I enjoyed this process of changing opinions because it tells me they are really hearing one another and willing to see an issue from a different perspective than their own. It was interesting to me how the focus from each youth was initially to discuss the adoption rather the lie about the birth certificate and adoption.

While we started the day’s session with a bit of an off day, the group ended up having a great session and coming together in the end.